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Silly Creations


Sometimes the Generator's output is just plain silly. Some of these are from previous versions of the Generator and won't happen any more, but they're still quite entertaining.

Pointless Mountain
Land
T: add 1 to your mana pool. Spend this mana only on red spells.

Legendary Creature - Human Wizard (2/1, red)
RR: two target multicoloured enchantments gain All permanents you control gain 1R, Tap an untapped permanent you control: ~this~ gains Whenever a creature becomes blocked by one or more creatures, unless an opponent sacrifices a black permanent, ~this~ gets +2/+0 until end of turn until end of turn until end of turn. When those permanents becomes the target of a green instant spell this turn, flip ~this~.
- - - - -
Legendary Creature - Human Wizard (1/3, red)
Whenever ~this~ is dealt damage, ~this~ gets +2/+0 until end of turn


Wall you control can't be blocked except by Cephalid
MTG: Mistform Ultimus!! Or MTG: Prison Barricade, MTG: Crude Rampart, MTG: Wall of Deceit, MTG: Mirror Wall, or other Mistform creatures...
Yes, I know there are walls that can attack. But it's still rather silly. --SF

Whenever you lose life, counter target spell
AlexChurchill rather likes this. Terrifyingly good with MTG: Mischievous Poltergeist or MTG: Unspeakable Symbol, but the countermage will run out of life eventually...

Whenever you lose life , destroy all permanents
Pay 3 life : destroy two target black permanents

an opponent may play Zombie spells with a mana cost less than or equal to B for up to 4 less

Whenever an opponent lose life , put target creature card card in target opponent's graveyard into their graveyard
At the beginning of your combat step , return target creature to their owner's hand
The second ability is scary, but sensible. The first is forbidden by design conventions - no card goes in a graveyard other than its owner's.
Looks to me like it's perfectly legal. It won't actually *do* anything (even reorder the graveyard), but... --AC

T: search target player's library for a card and put it into owner's graveyard
Possibly fun if cost increased. An instant possibly?
(PeterTaylor) As worded, basically a scary reanimator card. How about "target opponent's library"?

Enchanted permanent are creatures with power and toughness equal to their mana cost as well as their types

Goblins you control gain protection from Spike (not the creature, the player archetype!)

creatures with toughness less than or equal to 4 are land as well as their types

Hey, that's useful! - MoonShadow
(PeterTaylor) In an anti-land deck. Not otherwise - being a land doesn't automatically give them mana abilities.
No, it doesn't, but there's so much useful stuff you can do to land it's just not true. It's the sort of card you build decks around. Think squirrel deck with this, hecatomb and the card that makes all lands swamps in addition to their existing type, for instance. - MoonShadow
Or any of my random "Yay! We can make their land into ~foo~!" ideas. Now, with this and Humility, March of the Machines and Opalescence, we can make everything into ~foo~! --Requiem

permanents gain protection from permanent

Whenever a untapped Cephalid comes into play , a player may search library for a card , reveal it, and put it into hand . If so, shuffle that library afterwards. and any number of target Goblins get - 3 / + 3

permanents gain protection from blue
T : you may search library for a blue instant card , reveal it, and put it into hand . If so, shuffle that library afterwards. and target permanent gains cumulative upkeep: T
This one was shaping up to be quite an interesting card, right up to that last phrase.... - tjm
...which is nonetheless a hilarious way of giving something two upkeeps to live - Thallid Ice Cream Man

Beastdabeastdobeastbeast Beast
Creature - Beast (2/2, red)
2RR: put a 4/4 green Beast creature token into play
2RRRRR: put a 4/4 red Beast creature token with trample into play
Sacrifice a black creature: put a 4/4 red Beast creature token into play
1RRB: put a 3/3 red Beast creature token into play
Sacrifice a Beast: gain control of target blue creature until end of turn
first strike
RR: ~this~ deals 2 damage to target player
Gah!  The content filter here doesn't like me submitting certain words in certain forms, so a couple of other things on this page had words removed when I submitted this.  I'll avoid using this computer to edit pages from now on, unless I'm able to get my admin to remove that feature --Ultros

I Think Your Cards Are Better Than Mine
Instant (blue)
gain control of target library until end of turn
Almost from the Comprules: "A player draws a card by putting the top card of one of his or her libraries into his or her hand."

Military Incompetence
Instant (blue)
Affinity for Rogues
counter target activated ability from a Soldier source

Alleycat Intimidator
Creature - Cat (1/2, white)
All Birds can't attack
Gotta love the flavour. --AC

Creature - Treefolk (2/3, green)
trample
provoke
Okay, so the efforts to get everything all in flavour haven't been totally successful. --AC

Artifact
3: ~this~ is a artifact as well as its types until end of turn
Whenever equipped creature is turned face up, flip ~this~.
Equip 2
- - - - -
Legendary Artifact
All Thopters are enchantments as well as their types
T: two target creatures gain When ~this~ is put into a graveyard from play, target opponent may pay B. If that player does, draw a card until end of turn

Mad Scramble for the Pikes
Artifact
All permanents gain Whenever a creature is put into a graveyard from play, attach target Equipment to target creature with banding. Gain control of that Equipment until end of turn

Creature - Human Soldier (2/2, white and red)
Whenever ~this~ deals damage, target player may pay R. If that player does, ~this~ gets +1/+0 until end of turn
Whenever ~this~ is turned face up, target player may Pay 1 life. If that player doesn't, put a destiny counter on ~this~. If ~this~ has 5 destiny counters on it, flip it.
Morph 3WW
- - - - -
Legendary Creature - Human Soldier (1/3, white and red)
WWWWW, Discard a card: put X 1/1 white Bird creature tokens with flying into play, where X is the number of cards you have in hand
Get ready with those MTG: Backslides and MTG: Weaver of Lies.

From a [Type 4 game on CMC]:
Lonely Golem
Creature - Golem (1/1, black)?
At the beginning of your combat phase, target opponent reveals the top 1 cards of his or her library. that player puts all Golem cards from among them into play and put the rest into his or her graveyard

Merfolk Artificer
Creature - Merfolk (2/2, blue)
At the beginning of each player's upkeep, target opponent may Sacrifice a permanent. If that player doesn't, you reveal the top X cards of your library, where X is the amount of mana in your mana pool. you put all artifact cards from among them into hand and put the rest on the bottom of your library in any order
T: draw a card

I'm not sure that the timing works on this one -- can you have any mana in your manapool at the beginning of upkeep? -- Senji
I think it's ok. The ability will trigger and go on the stack at the beginning of the upkeeps, and you could add mana to your pool before it resolved. --CH

18 Mana?  Why, I Think I'll Draw a Card!
Creature - Human Wizard (3/2, blue and black)
4UUU: put a 1/1 blue Bird creature token with flying into play
1UB, sacrifice a Bird: draw a card
activated abilities cost any player 4 more to play
Tap an untapped black creature you control: attach target Aura to target creature. Gain control of that Aura until end of turn and put two charge counters on that Aura

Tap Your Lands Again For Me?  Please?
Creature - Bird Soldier (1/1, white)
Flying
When ~this~ comes into play, target opponent may pay 4. If that player does, you gain 1 life
W: untap up to 4 target permanents
double strike

Three Times the Scaring, Three Times the Fun
Instant (black)
all creatures with fear gain fear until end of turn and those creatures gain fear until end of turn

Mana Burn for Two Much?
Instant (green)
Choose one: add 2G to your mana pool; or add G to your mana pool; or you may return two creature cards from your graveyard to hand

This is Just a Narrow Tutor, Right?
Enchantment (black)
Transmute 1BB

Department of Redundancy Department
Land
T: add 2 to your mana pool
T: add 2 to your mana pool

Shatter Never Felt So Good
Artifact Creature - Golem (1/1, artifact)
All libraries are artifacts as well as their types
All Golems gain protection from red

Regenerator Hater
Creature - Snake (2/3, green)
Whenever ~this~ regenerates, you may Sacrifice ~this~. If you do, destroy all lands

Block Me, I Dare You
Creature - Zombie Goblin (1/2, black)
When ~this~ is put into a graveyard from play, draw 7 cards
When ~this~ is returned to its owner's hand, you may Discard a sorcery card. If you don't, destroy all creatures


Is There a Slower Path to Infinite Life?
Creature - Cat Knight (2/1, white)
2WUBRG: put a +1/+1 counter on ~this~
Remove 4 +1/+1 counters from ~this~: you gain 1 life

If Only My Flip Side Were a Zombie
Creature - Spirit (1/1, black)
B: ~this~ gains ~this~ can't block until end of turn
1UB, T: target Spirit gets -3/-3 (This effect doesn't end at end of turn) and that creature gets -3/-2 (This effect doesn't end at end of turn) and up to 2 target Spirits gain protection from blue until end of turn and target untapped enchantment gains When ~this~ leaves play, you may Sacrifice a basic land. If you do, all Beasts get -4/-4 until end of turn until end of turn
When any player controls no permanents, flip ~this~.
All legendary artifacts gain Sacrifice a Spirit, Pay 4 life: Regenerate ~this~
- - - - -
Legendary Creature - Spirit (1/1, black)
All Zombies get -1/-1

Quick, Get Me Another Source of Speed Counters, Stat!
Enchantment (red, white and blue)
At the beginning of your upkeep, target Dragon gets +2/+0 (This effect doesn't end at end of turn) and that creature gets +3/+0 until end of turn
2RR, Pay 2 life: ~this~ gains All Beasts gain Pay 4 life: put a speed counter on target artifact
When ~this~ is put into a graveyard from play, you may Pay 1 life. If you don't, put a speed counter on target enchantment
All artifacts with speed counters on them gain All permanents gain 1: add 3R to your mana pool
All permanents with speed counters on them gain When ~this~ leaves play, you put X 1/1 white Bird creature tokens with flying into play, where X is the number of permanent types among permanents you control (The permanent types are artifact, creature, enchantment and land)
All permanents with speed counters on them gain protection from creatures until end of turn

A Library with Haste!  Just What I Needed!
Instant (red)
all libraries gain At the beginning of each opponent's combat phase, up to 2 target Wizards get +3/+0 until end of turn until end of turn and untap those permanents and gain control of them until end of turn. They gain haste until end of turn.

Vulshok Jaguar Junk-Diving Grapeshot Welder
Creature - Cat (1/2, white)
When ~this~ comes into play, target opponent may Sacrifice a basic land. If that player does, you may return a card from your graveyard to play
Sacrifice a creature with flying: destroy target artifact
When ~this~ is put into a graveyard from play, you may pay W. If you don't, untap target artifact and regenerate that permanent
Whenever any player plays a Equipment spell, any number of target Cats get +1/+1 until end of turn

Phew...That Was Close!
(ravnica 1687092324) Enchantment - Aura (white and black) | Enchant basic land | Enchanted land is a creature with power and toughness equal to its converted mana cost as well as its types | Whenever an opponent gains life, two target Wizards get +0/+4 (This effect doesn't end at end of turn) | Sacrifice a Plains: tap up to X target permanents you control, where X is the amount of black mana in any player's mana pool | your opponents may play creature spells without paying their mana cost

But...You Just Said...
(ravnica 414061515) Instant (red) | Attach target Equipment to target Rogue. (Control of that Equipment doesn't change.) and gain control of that Equipment until end of turn

Gargoyles have a strange homeland
Tribal Land - Gargoyle
1B, T: add 2 mana of any one colour to your mana pool
When you control no nonblue creatures, flip ~this~.
- - - - -
Legendary Tribal Land - Gargoyle
4U, Pay 3 life: target white creature gains If a nonblue creature would be dealt damage, instead that creature gains banding until end of turn (This effect doesn't end at end of turn)

Jackpot!
(896604553) Creature - Bird Wizard (3/2, blue) | Flying | Flying | Flying / CMC: 7
And it even has the CMC 7 as a finishing touch!

An Armor-Piercing Bullet Just for You
(124337591) Tribal Instant - Generated Bird (white) | Regenerate target black creature and destroy target black creature. It can't be regenerated. / CMC: 3

Hey, Moxen Were Fair in Land Form
(land 1889107848) Legendary Land | Sacrifice ~this~, T: Add three mana of any one colour to your mana pool
Probably the most apropos use of Legendary I've seen from the generator.

The indecisive player's dream
Instant (black)
draw two cards, then discard two cards

Converted mana cost: 5
I seriously laughed. Unless there was some card that passively prevented you from discarding any cards whatsoever, this is just hilarious. -Espeorb

Creature - Spirit (1/1, white)
When the number of permanents you control is 1 or more, flip ~this~.
W: ~this~ gets +2/+1 until end of turn
Whenever you lose life, put a +1/+1 counter on ~this~
~this~ enters the battlefield with two +1/+1 counters on it
Tap an untapped Spirit you control, remove two +1/+1 counters from ~this~: put a 2/2 white Soldier creature token onto the battlefield
Discard a creature card, T, remove a +1/+1 counter from ~this~: untap target Spirit
Whenever ~this~ becomes blocked, destroy all artifacts
When ~this~ enters the battlefield, two target creatures with first strike get +0/+1 until end of turn
All Spirits are white
If ~this~ would deal combat damage, that damage is dealt to target attacking or blocking creature with vigilance instead
- - - - -
Legendary Creature - Spirit (3/3, white)
Discard a creature card: ~this~ gains vigilance until end of turn
(W/U)(W/U)(W/U)(W/U)(W/U): each player may search his or her library for up to three basic land cards and put them into the battlefield. Each player who searched his or her library this way shuffles it.

Converted mana cost: 3

Where shall I start? Number of permanents >=1? Vigilance in italics? Scarily large number of +1/+1 counters (if it's allowed to stick around and you have a repeatable life-loss card)? If fact, general scariness of whole top half - which is completely unusable?

Useless much?
Land
W, Tap an untapped red creature you control, T: add W to your mana pool
T: add 1 to your mana pool
T: add 1 to your mana pool
--His sugar feeds more than even the whispered rope
Foucault, the elder

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