DuctTapeAndTheForce

• Each player may normally make only one entry to each round. However, that entry may consist of anything: one or more sentences or clauses, a photo, a link to a website, or whatever.
  
• An entry with multiple parts which don't seem connected may be less likely to win in many cases, since the judges often have preferences for succinctness or against what could feel like multiple attempts. However, this is at the judge's discretion. The judge may add comments or special criteria, or choose to relax any of the normal rules, in the description of their round.
  
• Once the round is finished and judged, further discussion of any form is allowed and encouraged, including  (but not limited to ;) ) any of the contestants or the judge posting further ideas.
  

Round 111

Query: The PM now, or on New Year's Eve? It might not be the same one. --Rachael

Multiple entries are permitted --DouglasReay

One is a fool's staff of office, the other is an office staffed by a fool. --PeterTaylor NB [OED bauble n. III 7a] is behind a paywall, but a Cambridgeshire library card will grant access

It promises all manner of sparkly shine, but inside is only empty dark void. --MoonShadow

Round 108

Invented by brilliant scientists, built with space age technology, used for [storing cats]. --MoonShadow

Both are mostly transparent but manage to obfuscate what goes on underneath --WeirDoe

Both are smaller than the other --WeirDoe

It's designed to be hard to break. --PeterTaylor

Both can be a window to the world. --qqzm

Round 109

Why is espionage like Mao? --PT

Why is Monopoly like the British political system? --AC

Round 108

Loquat grape txts on my apple! --MoonShadow

Both are rather inappropriate for communicating that someone is being dismissed from their employment. --Whistway

Some are pithy and/or seedy. --Rachael

No one gets five a day any more. --Rachael

Yes, it [will blend]. --MoonShadow

Enjoying either can begin by Blackberry picking. --Whistway

Depending on the type... Some are more 'appealing' than others. --Whistway

Only part of the full story. --mtb

Thanks Alex, it's certainly a leadership style I've considered... However Watermelons do make more of an overall impact. --Whistway

Round 107

If you're not careful how you spend your time, dross'll-fill-a large chunk of it. --CH

[Drosophila]. Genius. --Admiral

I know. Somewhat disheartening to have such a fantastic one so soon. --mtb

It soon passes. --PT

Both are not noticed until large amounts of them appear. --mtb

I really like PT's dual meaning and mtb's actual noticed similarity, but for the sheer amount of pain inflicted it has to be a point to CH. --MoonShadow

Round 106

nagi will happily set it on fire, yet it will return in full strength after a time. --MoonShadow

Dumbledore has an impressive one. --Rachael

There's only one of each in the PhoenixFeathers character pages --SunKitten

One is [an illusion], while the other is [an illustration].  --Pallando

Some people would run screaming from either. -- mtb

Kissing either could give you a nasty burn. --CH

Russian forests contain both. -- mtb

Oooh, thanks! --MS?

Round 105

Both are better when fuelled by surges of mad creativity. Who needs planning? --SunKitten

Undertaken by people in pursuit of more degrees. --Rachael

Engineers forget how to do them. --Rachael

Always too short. -- mtb

Taking them away is always more pleasurable. -- mtb

If done optimally neither ever gets to be rote. --WeirDoe

Professors always assume you can do more during one than is possible. -- mtb

When it's done, you feel that you need a holiday to recover. --PT

Both are also like busses: you get a long period without any and then three come along at once. --PT

You can get a computer-generated one for cheap, but it won't be as good as the real thing. --AC

Yay! Thank you! :) I will share a bit with AC and SunKitten; sadly mtb is too far away. --Rachael

One of those things. Many of the interesting people live on the wrong continent. *sigh* --mtb

Chocolate arrived today, thank you!

My pleasure - Enjoy! :) --Whistway

Round 104

What are you listening to? Narnia business --SunKitten

You can lose yourself in a creative base (bass)  --Whistway

Both look at a little strange under a woolly hat  --Whistway

You never want to go back to the regular sort. --MoonShadow

The right disc can make them magical (One for the TerryPratchett fans!) --Whistway

Because [Hamatora] --MoonShadow

Hardcore fans seem to think they actually exist. --Rachael

Without the Earth to ground us they could both be far more shocking! --Whistway

Immersing yourself in either lets you escape reality for a little while. --Pallando

When comparing them to what you have... Sometimes it Hz --Whistway

Round 103

At some point, both are going to end up headless. --MaxDymond

Not what you want to see if you open a tin of tuna. --AlexChurchill

Where-ships involved... A net amount are captured in-sections. --Whistway

Both were unsuccessful flavours of icecream. --Whistway

Apparently anointed  --Whistway

Better with tomato sauce. --mtb

Both get caught in nets or webs. --mtb

About half of them end up in pizzas/pieces --Androidkiller

Cats like to eat them. --Rachael

One starts off spineless, the other ends up spineless. --mtb

Both are an amusing addition to Easter Eggs if resealed inside before being given as a gift! --Whistway

Round 102

They're both better with rounded corners  --MaxDymond

Both are never quite as good as they look. --Mtb?

Having several at the same time is more than un œuf --WeirDoe

Both are a smaller form of a larger system, sans a proper shell. --WeirDoe

You can get access to both by cracking them. -- Mtb?

Airline staff will discourage you from using either during the flight. --AC

You can't install Linux on one yet, but give them time... --MS?

You can use either one to fry the other. --MS?

Both are frequently panned. -- mtb

You can [wrap them in bacon], but don't microwave them. --DR

Scramble improves on both of them -- Whistway (In honour of the game that Rachael plays against my wife!)

Using a Cadburys Creme Egg for either is fun but impractical -- Whistway

If you're not careful, you'll overdo it --PT

People in America often aim to make them 'over-easy'.. --Whistway

Both can be customised through the use of creative rings..  --Whistway

Neither are that good on orange. --Whistway

Round 101

Are multiple entries allowed?

Sorry, only just spotted this. Yes, though I didn't specify and no-one did--PWF

101 using binary truth values = on, then off, then on  --Pallando

A spot of black interrupts the light. --AlexChurchill

Either could be blamed for eating your homework. --Rachael

Experiencing one at home would be fine... but 101 in a row would be truly barking and could create charging and subsequent running issues --Whistway

Either can be used to secretly get rid of unwanted greens from your dinner plate. --qqzm

Rounds 99 - 100

Both create new bodies.  --Pallando, whose new daughter is due in under 1 month's time.

It's only when you fall that it's power and importance become so apparent --Whistway

It brings you together. --AlexChurchill (or wait, in fact...)

It has a light side and a dark side and it holds the universe together. --AlexChurchill

A crazed Isaac Newton uses it to redirect fate. --MoonShadow

It remains strong at large distances. --PT

Aw! I like that :) --PWF

It can get you soaring high, or bring you down with a bump. --PWF

Splat! --Edith

It holds the universe together and has a dark side and a light side.  *sicks pedantic tongue out at judge* --Pallando

Judge sticks it back.

Suggesting to your girlfriend that you can fix her broken vase with either, does not provoke a positive reaction :)--Whistway

(Said in a very poor imitation of Yoda) When first mastering it you wish...  appealing you will find it and fully-wrapped up in it you become... guidance to carefully unravel the complexities you will need --Whistway

It's helpful when things go wrong, but it's better to do them right in the first place so you don't need it. --AlexChurchill

It only tells half the story. You can accomplish a lot with just the Force or with just political skill, but to cover all situations you need to have both. So it is with duct tape and WD40. --PT

Using it wrongly can get you into a sticky situation. --PWF

Everybody loves it's abilities but no one wants to know how it really works. --Edith

Clever application prevents border control officials from bothering you. --AlexChurchill

Round 98

It's the children's version. If they play their cards right, when they grow up they can trick or treat an entire nation! --PT

Beware of deeds done in the dark which may come back to haunt you. --PWF

Some think it's harmless, others think it's satanic. --Rachael

On the surface, it's quite scary; but then you realise that it's all just pretend anyway. --CH

It's all about give and take. --AC

(alternatively:) What goes around comes around. Throw egg at someone now, and their children will throw egg at you. --AC

The US-American influence is very notable, at least here in Spain. --PT

Round 97

Bother, I meant to enter this morning, with "If you haven't experienced it for a while, you might be feeling a little whist-ful". But that might be one of your puns anyway... --CH

Round 96

Both are a musical journey, that prove that being involved in the process of unwrapping and understanding an incredible gift can result in wonderfully experiencing 'holy presence' --Whistway

When the music stops, another layer is revealed, until you arrive at the central treasure. --Pigwotflies

I was just about to write something similar. Bah. :) --CH

Both are things you hope your postman remembers. --AC

Round 95

As ever, I would if I could. I am spectacularly bad at thinking of these, I'm afraid - SunKitten

I'll have a ponder over the weekend. In the meantime, Monday's the 15th. --CH

So it is. Corrected --Pigwotflies

Individually they're pretty to look at, but after a hundred of them have passed over you you'll be dead. --Rachael

The white stallion took winter to reign over, because winters were white back then; so the black mare took summer, because it's at the opposite end of the year. The dapple grey saw how things were going, and quickly declared himself for spring, since it's in between. The zebra was about to speak, but the brown pony kicked it: "You're not even a real horse!" So the poor zebra ran off to the birch grove to cry, and no-one's seen her since; and that's why autumn is actually more like a brown pony than a zebra. --MoonShadow

Both remove foliage without the need for a chainsaw. --Edith

Both can be affected (sometimes quite amusingly) by a long enough spring! --Whistway

Round 94

Both involve lots of people in long black garments wearing silly hats. --CH

Strange, eldritch creatures, normally hidden from mortal eyes, fill the streets. --MoonShadow

Slightly chilly. --AC

Awesome chocolates if you know where to look --Edith

Some people breeze through it having fun, others cower in a corner in terror and wonder when it will be over. --Pigwotflies

At the start of October you think "Oh my goodness, is it that time already?" --AC

Round 93

Both get [sucked on by Cleopatra] --Pallando

Nooo, say it isn't so? Dunno about anyone else, but I spent a while trying to come up with an entry for this round - I think it was just a difficult round. We might see more entries with a different question. I hope. --Rachael

Round 92

PT pokes Vitenka

Blegh.  No funny entries really.  Point to Edith I guess.  --Vitenka

There is truly nothing in life as wonderful as heartfelt positive feedback to inspire and encourage! :) --Whistway

Round 91

Green reflects in blue,/ red-gold rays illuminate./ Jumbled, or sublime? --MJ

[Cubers] --DR

I might if I knew

more about Nova Scotia.

It's a bit obscure... --Rachael

Yes, this game works best

when both halves are things that we're

familiar with. --AC

See the Northern Lights

- Aurora Borealis -

Like a Rubik's Cube --qqzm

It matters a lot

To a few thousand people

And no-one else cares --PT

Round 90

A well stocked pantry and comfy furniture throughout --Edith

It's where the adventure starts. --MoonShadow

One led me to [the other]. --MJ

Ironic given MoonShadow was the first to inflict that video upon me :) --MJ

Round 89

[Compulsive], if you're into that sort of thing; maddening otherwise. --DR

Too many [bobcats] might threaten its survival. --Rachael

It's frustrating when the snipers win. --AC

It can feel like you're exhausting yourself running but not getting anywhere. --AC

They've [both] [inspired] Weird Al songs. --PT

Neither are willing to act as a markplace for human organs --Edith

Round 88

I had been going to give honourable mention to Rachael for finding a picture and the point to MJ.  But then I realised that I was judging with my head, and that was all wrong.  The one I actually laughed at on reading it was PT, so point to PT.--DR

Round 87

Not what you want to discover when strapped into a fairground ride. --AC

Always in those hard-to-get-to places. --AC

Desperation eventually defeats embarrassment in the attempt to get rid of it --MJ

If you have to ask, you weren't there. --PT, per pro [Cesspool].

I'm going to have to give it to Mike. --qqzm

Round 86

You can only go a short way into either before you're forced to wonder what you're doing. -- SGB

Ewwww. --Admiral

Both tend to be consumed faster than expected. --Edith

It's best shared with friends. --PT

Usually they pass by slowly, but sometimes they stampede towards you at a frightening rate. --Rachael

You should be prepared.. facing 2010 could be a little scary --Whistway

How now --SF

Because both look better after 2 bottles of hobgoblin [dont ask] macloud

A look for SGB, an honourable mention for PeterTaylor, and a point to Rachael. - MoonSgadow?

Round 85

Nice :) --Rachael

Wow! A plethora superb of answers… Honourable mentions to Rachael, PT and SGB, however after several minutes of careful thought (combined with far too many Christmassy biscuits and a cracker that failed to supply a hat!) I chose a winner…… Moonshadow. Point to Moonshadow (and one to Santa.)

Round 84

Ah, nicely done; I was looking for an Iceland reference, but couldn't make it work :) --AC

Round 83

Nice entries, all! MoonShadow's reference makes me nostalgic, and SunKitten's reference to the same thing just makes me giggle (no connection to SunKitten was in my mind when I was setting the question!). The contrast between Rachael's first and SGB's also makes me giggle.

I love all of Whistway's (I'm rapidly becoming familiar with newspapers full of excrement in the Kitten sense, although thankfully not the Tabloid sense). But then, I heartily approve of all of Rachael's as well. There are runners up in "unlikely to see in the sky" and "comes into your bedroom and wakes you up", but I think the award has to go to "aww-inspiring". So congratulations and point to Rachael.

Round 82

Of course for the kitten, that wouldn't be a problem - they can quite happily survive a fall where they have reached terminal velocity. However, the lack of significant oxygen to breathe at 80,000 feet might cause hassle. --Admiral

I don't think Edwin actually wrote it here - I thought this whole round was inspired by a statement on ToothyChat that Edwin wasn't annoyed by either kittens or clouds. --Rachael

Heh. Not quite. Edwin indeed didn't write it here, but posted it on ToothyChat immediately after Vitenka asked the question. In fact, so soon after Vitenka asked the question that Edwin hadn't seen the question at all, and was in fact referring to a completely different topic of conversation. But people pointed out that it looked entertainingly like a DTaTF entry, and so I posted it here for a joke. --AlexChurchill (also yay, I win!)

Round 81

Nice! --Rachael

Round 80

Isn't that true for all X and Y? --SGB

Not in multiple senses of "on". --Rachael

Perhaps, but I do like the double meaning of cards there. --SGB

I must say, my computer takes the same size cards every time.  And if you upgrade, isn't the trend towards miniturisation? --MJ

I was thinking of "big" graphics cards with lots of onboard processing power. I think it's reasonable, or at least not unheard of, to call them big. --Rachael

Oh, very smooth. --CH

 Valentine's day       A computer
  Expensive             Expensive
  Shiny                 Shiny
  A little bit adult    A little bit adult
  A lot sweet           A little bit sour
  Quality: 85%          Quality: 30%

Gosh. Many good submissions - this was tough to judge. I don't normally like the "talk about X in the language of Y"-style entries, although Whistway's first was clever. SF set a good standard with the first entry, and many others were very good. I think the shortlist is: Rachael's second ("cards"), Chel for an entertainingly cynical take, Whistway's second for an unashamed pun on "fan", and MoonShadow's charming table. It comes down to the puns, and I had a really tough time choosing between Rachael and Whistway. In the end, "cards" is a stronger association with each of the two subjects, and so I think Rachael just wins it by a hair. Point to Rachael. --AC

Round 79

No need to apologise - keep 'em coming :) --Rachael

Arguable, on both fronts. --Admiral

Another impressive set of answers, so good in fact that I struggled to narrow down my honourable mentions list. So...Honorable mentions to all, but a little more to MoonShadow, qqzm, AlexChurchill(2nd answer) and Garbled. But the winner is... AlexChurchill for his first answer. Point to AlexChurchill  

Alex please do the next round or I will hire a team of lemmings to hunt you down, don’t worry they wont hurt you, but they will build an irritating little bridge in front of you; The bridge will almost enable you to get to where you want to go, but it will be just slightly too short and you’ll hate that :) --Whistway 

Round 78

A magical selection of answers! I was under no illusion that this round would be difficult to cast judgement on ;) Honourable mentions to ChrisHowlett, M-A and Requiem. However it was the final entry that won it at the last moment Point to Edith  

Round 77

Was it the question or the timing that's responsible for the relative lack of answers? Ah well. An honourable mention to Rachael, but Whistway takes it by a nose. (No, I don't know whose nose).

Presumeably, his own nose.  If he used anyone else's nose to take it, they would have a right to complain about nosejacking. --MJ

It was definitely my own nose, I know that because I picked it myself ;) --Whistway

I'm glad to hear you didn't pick anyone else's! --MJ

Round 76

Do you mind multiple entries? It's just that there's so much potential, and I haven't even got to the puns yet. --Rachael

Multiple entries are fine... although I think we should set a limit of 317 entries per person, otherwise it could just get silly. --Whistway

As expected the answers were all superb. Which is probably what makes this such a terribly difficult round to judge. Honourable mentions to Rachael, FR and AlexChurchill.. who all came VERY close to winning. However they were just beaten by PT (In the round, not with weaponry), Point to PT

Which one? --Admiral

I thought someone may ask that question... PT's first answer came very close to winning... but it was the third answer that won it :) --Whistway

Round 75

It's inadvisable to eat either while wearing false teeth. --Rachael

Fat men that get stuck in the latter have a tendency to shout; fat men that get stuck in the former can't. --CH

It's surprising how far it stretches. --AlexChurchill

Demolishing either is really good fun --Edith

I'm not sure, but if Santa can't spot the difference it's going to be a strange Christmas :) --Whistway

Wow. Well, that was a really difficult one, like Rachael said. There were some fantastic answers though. I loved the fat men and the false teeth, but the prize definitely has to go to Whistway for making me laugh (or at least grunt) out loud. Point to Whistway

Yay! Did anyone notice that I used the same line that I won 'Round 52' with? :) Is that the first time that the same line has won twice? I hope so. --Whistway

Round 74

Someone's nicked the little piece of card that tells you what's-what and eaten everything that isn't nougat. - MoonShadow

Almost all arrangements quickly devolve to small blocks of four that no-one wants to eat.  --Vitenka

With the right attitude, they can be heaven, but sometimes you just get into a sticky mess --Androidkiller

The really nice ones cost a fortune and depend heavily on slave labour --SGB

The bitter portions can be surprisingly gratifying. --CH

There is always one (for me, thats the coffee one) that doesn't taste as good as the rest. --Tsunami

Best when fruity, and/or with a few nuts. --AC (and also, being smooth doesn't make you likeable.)

It's based on an imported product, better implemented in mousse. --Edith

Nobody expects to bite into a crunchy raw unboned real dead frog. --PT

A deeper enjoyment arises when individuals focus on exploring what is on the inside, rather than the purely superficial outer shell --Whistway

I thought to myself, when setting this round, that I wouldn't pick any cynical answers, because I'm quite partial to both chocolates and life. And, accordingly, I very much like AC's, Whistway's and CH's. However, there's another entry which, while cynical, is both witty and thought-provoking, and so I'm going to award the point to SGB. Also, a bonus point to whoever sets the next round, as a bribe to stop the game fizzling out again. --Rachael

Round 73

If this is indeed the case then I think CH should judge the previous round first. Since it appears that he hasn't.

D'oh, and double d'oh. 'tis I. I will do both at some near-future point. --CH

Round 72

What, like caffeine? --CH

I was going with the Beatles song. Or do I misunderstand you? --PT

Gah. I was misremembering my own question, and thinking you were comparing the game to the song. My brain fade. This comments will self-destruct tomorrow. --CH

Succinctness is a virtue - it goes to AndroidKiller?! --CH, finally.

Round 71

I don't: enter away..  --FR

Round 70

Wearing of wellies advised. --PT

It is white, fluffy, mostly made of ice and crunches underfoot. --Requiem

They are all very subtly different, but all look pretty much the same (if you allow me the liscence of using 'snowflake' instead of just 'snow').  --FR

Heavy falls of either would bring London to a grinding halt --SF

Neither is remotely as clean as the Christmas cards would have you believe. --Koryne

A Plough there stored may move a hoard to free those with windows. --Garbled

People in cities can go for years without seeing either --Androidkiller

It burns. - MoonShadow

It seems gentle and innocent, but is capable of causing death. --PT

Ingredients in pretty pictures. --Requiem

If you have one, your chances of encountering the other might just be a bit greater.  --FR

Wavering light, a ritual sight, their absence our plight --Garbled

Snow way you can get four candles into a suitable pun --Androidkiller

To use, alight. - MoonShadow

The result follows from the previous two lemmas and the transitivity and reflexivity of "like" --Edwin

I think you mean symmetry rather than reflexivity, but if "like" were reflexive then romantic comedy would be an empty genre. --PT

Oops. It's scary how fast I forget things. --Edwin

And, in turn, don't you mean symmetric rather than reflexive? If "like" (in the sense you're implying) were reflexive, that seems to just imply that everyone likes themselves :) --AC

:bag: --PT

Burns nice and bright on those long winter evenings. --Requiem

Both are pleasing to look at in a nostalgic kind of way, but are rarely really very useful.  --FR

Either could be used to help keep your horse warm --SF

If a certain child was born on a certain day then I may say that eight may have been in one, whereas others may say that three, four or more were present. Some would consider "A great miracle happened there" may refer to this, but another tradition may say conservation is the moral. Oil is well. Oil are blessed. [Insert traditional greeting to your deit(y/ies)/fellowman/woman/frog here. --Garbled

Both can be useful in a large thunderstorm --Androidkiller

Round 69

When it rolls across the screen, you know nothing interesting's going to happen. --ChrisHowlett

That depends on whether it is candy floss or not. --Admiral

Seeing one often makes you realise that what was once full of life is now a desolate, hollow shell. - MoonShadow

Once they break away from their roots, they're dead. --AC

The western frontier is full of tumbleweeds; Frontier is full of... --SGB, running and hiding

It can travel great distances, yet [produce very little pollution] --PT

Both are cool if they contain Johnny Depp. --Edith

One is a lifeless husk devoid of any interest, the other is a North American plant... --Tsunami

Neither seems to be particularly good at answering queries. --Admiral

Either can have great comedic effect, intentional or not. --Steve

You always need exactly two, no more, no less, to make it worth it.  --FR

Round 68

The match flames twice, then all the lights go out.  --FR

Both make me fume --Androidkiller

Eek! I meant to enter, really I did. I've been manically busy preparing to go on a conference for a week (that's my excuse, anyway). More relevant is the absence of this page from RecentChanges (and thus my consciousness) for the past day or two, of course :) --AC

Likewise, without the conference bit. --Rachael

I'm just lazy. --Edith

Hey, it wasn't the most inspiring / punworthy choice of starting words that there's been.  Round 69, anyone?  Probably Androidkiller's choice on recent precedent?  --Jumlian

Round 67

What's your stand on multiple submissions? --CH

They're sucky and should be avoided. --Edith

Ok, I won't add it. Judge away, oh Judge. --CH

Can we see it after the judgement? I'm curious. --Rachael

Of course. In retrospect, it's not that good anyway. --CH

It was going to be "From my point of view, they're both as bad as nuts." --CH

Peer review? What a bunch of ouefs! --Tsunami

It starts [running] and gets harder. --PT

You know you like it, but when you're getting up for your 9am lectures it often seems like way too much effort. - MoonShadow

Everything starts sunny-side up but inevitably ends up scrambled. --Jumlian

A drawing of either looks like a Mexican on a bicycle. --AC

Starts out clear, but quickly becomes opaque, and is rarely over-easy. --CH

It's broken. --Rachael

They're both fine until you get Edwina Curry involved.  --FR

Everyone has their own opinions on how they should be done --Androidkiller

For most people, one degree is quite un oeuf. --qqzm

You can't hatch a chicken from either --SF

It's misshapen, mostly white, greasy, and has a squidgy centre. --Requiem

Things got much worse for them after they left their calcium shells --SGB

Round 66

Both contain really tiny houses. --M-A

(And on those lines) "Things a smurfy smurf would smurf!" --Vitenka (really hates that game)

Neither should be consumed until properly examined. --Edith

Both have a habit of growing in rings on the ground. --Admiral

They can both have both poisonous and hallucinagenic effects on people, especially if used in excess.  --FlameRider

Not mush room. --AC (was that meeple on the road, or the field, or the castle? And move back, I want to put a tile where your foot is...)

Dammit, beat me to that one. CategoryObviousPun?? --Androidkiller

Well, some rounds have the most obvious puns get taken by the first or second entrant, and everybody after that bemoaning the lack of good possibilities. At least I let 5 other people have a go before I made this entry :) --AC

Admitting ‘the discovery’ of either in your living room does not automatically make you a fungi (Fun guy). --Whistway

They can be hunted and gathered. --Rachael

They're round and flat. --PeterTaylor

You have to be careful with both, or they can do strange things to your brain. --Androidkiller

For a short time after a Pixie dies, its toadstool has a carcass on. --qqzm

Dammit, beat me to that one. --CH, who was just going to make a joke of that form.

(PeterTaylor) I didn't. My answer only really works for the place in France.

Round 55

Ah tea a bee, Ai be a 'te?  Bai ti, a bea!  --Vitenka (I did taw a be!)

Die Fliedermaus is an opera, and in market research you get [tab houses]... so this is a previously solved problem. --SGB

So nar if we need to, we can move from place to place without someone having to point at things! ;) --Whistway

Demonstrating an excessively large one to the innkeeper can earn you a fun encounter with the bouncer if you're out of gold pieces. - MoonShadow

Applying either to a wodge of text will likely shift it sideways somewhat. --SF

Vandals use them for indentation. --Rachael

One is smoked by Geordies, the other disapears in a cloud of smoke when transforming into a vampire! --Tsunami

Round 54

Because for the most part windows are rendered correctly? --Jumlian.

Both require boats to cross the Atlantic.  --Vitenka

People get frightened by a Phantom in either. --ChrisHowlett

One is best experienced in a foreign language, the other in a foreign country. -- Senji

If the walls are too thin, the neighbours complain about the noise. - MoonShadow

You're not supposed to see what happens behind the curtains --Edith

If it only has one story, it's a little flat --Rachael

You don't appreciate advertisement beeing sticked to it --Grumpf

Round 53

Both can cause things to be [Serra]-ted. --ChrisHowlett

They tend to be sharp and to the point. --AC (See, e.g., NIV: Luke 24: 4-7, NIV: Acts 12: 7, NIV: Acts 12: 23, ...)

That last passage seems to be in the wrong order. I'd expect him to die before being eaten by worms... --CH

Nah, they just nibble slowly - takes a lot of worms before you die of blood loss.  Or maybe hunger, if they were tapey.  --Vitenka (who has no entry besides the obvious exclamation of "Transubstantition!")

(PeterTaylor) Josephus makes the same claim. Translation by William Whiston: "Nay, further, his privy-member was putrefied, and produced worms".

Academics can spend way too long trying to analyse them, when really they should just be admiring their beauty. CURSWiki: Androidkiller

They have radiance. And some of them are right. --Rachael

Both might be found on the head of a pin --Edith

To Angle (ie to fish/ maneuver for something) reely comes from the old English angel meaning fishhook. So Ann, gel you can angle for an angel with your angel --Garbled

Everyone has one. --PeterTaylor (who would like to state at this point that he's punning on folk-Christianity rather than making an assertion of truth)

One word: Pi-ety. --Bobacus

[Acute angle]; [A cute Angel] --qqzm.

Both are factors pertaining to the physical properties of pinheads.  --FR

Both are annoyingly interchangable in the world of "Word" --Hoshi-Chan

Round 52

(because) Catchphrases Mask jokes.  --Vitenka

MoonShadow: Used to get used all the time during those longer winter evenings. These days it only sees very occasional action..

AlexChurchill: Spending too much time on it will make your head give off puffs of smoke.

I'm not sure, but if Santa can't spot the difference it's going to be a strange Christmas :)--Whistway

Because you're never quite sure if you really need it, but you still want it to be around CURSWiki: Androidkiller

Round 51

MoonShadow: No matter how far you try to run, you can still see one right behind you.

Bobacus: You can't get a decent cup of Coffee at either.

Steve: Both have the same mass.

CURSWiki: Androidkiller : Both have a dark side

One meeeellion Dollars!  --Vitenka

That's no moon. It's a coffee shop! --K (channeling Obi-wan)

Both contain cheese --Edith

Often new or full. --Rachael

Somewhat lacking in atmosphere. --AlexChurchill

One is a site of Selene's beams, one is a site for selling beans. --Garbled

Both often look quite nice from a distance, but when you get close up you will probably be very disappointed.  --FR

They both make you want to howl --Jumlian

Round 50

Despite getting on a bit, they still pass expert scrutiny. --CH

Round 49

There is an inverse correlation between the number of pirates and the number of Cambridge students over time. Moreover, [as the number of pirates has declined, global temperatures have risen]. I propose, therefore, that Pirates are an unstable material, with a half-life of around 4 years, and the decay sequence is roughly as follows: 1 pirate -> 2 Cambridge students + 1 Starbucks + infrared radiation; 1 Starbucks -> 2 Mobile telephone shops + 1 Hairdresser + 10m3 of greenhouse gas. Arr, matey!  - MoonShadow

Deliberately crashing boats into each other. --Edwin

(PeterTaylor) People think they're stuck in the 17th century, but in fact they exploit modern technology.

Silly sayings, strange accents, mad dress codes and the tacit approval of the state.  And steal spanish gold.  --Vitenka (via training fees, for the cabin boy, naturally.)

Scurvy, mutinous and destructive yet still strangely fun. --Steve   

Copying information in ways the authorities don't like. --AlexChurchill ("Spencer, did you do this example sheet on your own?")

It's a rather fun game, which gets harder the longer you play, but has no fixed end point. -- Xarak

Ah, nostalgia. --CH

Novel for a little while, but apparently pretty tricky to get out of.  In the manner of a black hole.  Oh, and... THE CLAW!!  Ahem.  --FR

Round 48

You look on in wonder and plan a new construction, only to find that others have already staked their claim.  --Vitenka (is [linking to source] considered tacky?)

Often kept up high, just out of reach, sometimes new and occasionally full. --Jumlian

They go through phases, and they're generally not suitable for people who like a lot of gravity. --Rachael

Often reported to have strange affects on certain individuals. --Steve

The gullible may be induced to believe that they a) are made of green cheese, b) have real men in them.  Quadruple points for gulling someone into both simultaneously. --MJ

Both ae things whic are there all of the time, but are rarely truely observed or appreciated.  --FR

Lunacy. --Edwin

Watching either for long can become quite mesmerizing. --Susan?

Go around either and you end up back where you started. --Nataku

each (was found in )?rose crescent yesterday. --PT

Both make me think of cheese. --Tsunami

A number of people who go to GamesEvenings would declare "(T)Suki!" when confronted with either. --K

Neither of them are flat. --Requiem

Round 47

Because both end up mown (moan). --DR

The correct dosage is 6g to 9g daily.  Needs to be protected from light and moisture.  --Vitenka (Elymus repens)

Snape believes both can be made more useful by being brewed into a potion --K

Gets rolled around on a lot in the racier sort of fanfic. --MoonShadow

Begins somewhat green; ends up less so. --Requiem

Inherited a zigzag shape from his parent. --AlexChurchill

Both are often Forlorn (For-lawn)and can be the subject of many cutting remarks. --Whistway

Bends in a storm but does not break. --Nataku

I would happily use a lawnmower on both. --Tsunami

Although it starts short, it ends up getting too long. --Edwin

Both could be protected by a Lily, or overshadowed and stifled by a Petunia. --Rachael

Wow! Rachael you're answer should be disqualified for being too "blooming" clever! (You Budding genius! - Sorry for the Flower puns)--Whistway

Needs cutting. --Edith

According to the good Pope, both are likely to stain young children. --Taz

At the risk of sounding too serious, and noticing that most people are talking about grass and not a blade of grass, I'd say that both started life likely to be choked by those surrounding them, and both still have a rather fragile-seeming lifespan.  --FR  (Who thanks PeterTaylor for specifying a blade of grass rather than merely grass, which would have led to far funnier comments but also far more irreverant ones.)

Many Thanks --Whistway

Acceptance speech? --DR

Round 46

Cambridge has way too many of them, but their usefulness varies depending on who you talk to... --AC

Both transmit data and addresses.  --Vitenka

Both can be used to gain access to the University Library. --Edith.

Heh, I'm not sure that was the intent of the line, but the imagery is certainly worthy.  Call out the paper :)  --Vitenka

Actually the ram-raiding was just what I had in mind --Edith

Round 45

Evilgasm.  --Vitenka sticks to order

Embedded in the stomach, they deliver a 150-point hit to the waistline. - MoonShadow

When they break up into small pieces, everything gets rather sticky. -- Xarak

Both are often deployed by worms. --Steve

There are always better alternatives. --Rachael

You know, if that weren't heresy it'd be a winner.  And JaffaCakes exist, so it's not heresy which leads me to.. ewww.  Entry #2. --Vitenka

Prequel to JaffaCakes.  --Vitenka (Orangey bit in the middle...)

(PeterTaylor) JaffaCakes are cakes, not biscuits.

A religious war, but you are quite correct.  Nonetheless, I maintain that if you start with custard creams, you'll sooner or later move onto JaffaCakes.  It's a gateway biscuit.  --Vitenka

Funny, but when I tried to set up a CustardCream? as my gateway, my internet connection stopped working! --MJ

Ah, you forgot to configure the correct bkt in your firewall config, clearly.  --Vitenka

Not true. I, for instance, like custard creams, but am allergic to Jaffa Cakes. --CH

Here, then, we have proof that you are an invader!  --Vitenka

(PeterTaylor) If they explode just above your head, it's going to hurt.

Ah - I didn't know the worms stuff.  And I really ought to be disqualified because my first attempt was so poor :)  --Vitenka  (And one reading of my second is truly truly tasteless)

Round 44

One is ubiquitous, helpful, somewhat odd, and generally obsessed with pornography. The other is a website. --Requiem

Our college has one although they're really security, while it also warns against the lack of securith on the other, especially when searching for refenences.  --FR

Your question will be treated pedantically; the instant answers will tend to the unhelpful from one and the inscrutable from the other. - MoonShadow

Neither will help you with your problem directly, but may point you in the direction of someone who can. --K

Infinite, for any practical purposes.  --Vitenka

One minds pigeonholes, the other has a [whole mind of pigeons] --SMcV

Both see incredible amounts of traffic without batting an eyelid, but neither will carry your luggage. Even if you ask! --AC

Both provide reasonable company and entertainment at 4am. --Edith

Sometimes they give you cookies. --Rachael

Both guard the entry-points to arcane domains. --ChrisHowlett

Both are slowly taking over the world! --PaulPower

(PeterTaylor) They have the ability to remember you 40 years later.

One looks after keys. The other looks, after keys. --Taz

Both share the goal of the British library special forces. --Steve

That's already been said by someone else --Edwin, who likes cookies

Round 43

One has a coat of arms sable, garnished Or; the other is garnish on a coat of arms sable (the lord of the Isle of Man, I think). --Requiem

Slightly silly when mounted on an old mans head. --Steve 

Both look like overly-elaborate beehives.  --FR

Point to Requiem on the basis of trivia. Although Steve gets an honourable mention for being the funniest.

Round 42

Feculant!  --Vitenka (Come on, admit it - it's a great word.  Also, I make a terrible cup of tea.)

Some people like, some people don't, and it ends up down the drain in the end. -- Xarak

Both are out of a job. --Requiem

Bag ends up in hot water; leaves, strained. --Rachael

Students who dislike labour prefer coffee instead. --AlexChurchill

Ouch.  But isn't an all-nighter usually caused by a need for more labour?  --Vitenka

In my house at least, left to stew in hot water for far too long.  Isn't there some kind of witch test this can be equated to as well?  --FlameRider

Better if stirring --DR

Very nice over a plate of fish and chips. --Edith (speaking from personal experiance)

You like tea poured over your fish?

Well, it's a common enough occurence that I guess you could grow to prefer it that way.  --Vitenka

I like tea as an accompanyment to the meal :P English has so many interpretations... --Edith

(PeterTaylor) I can't find a decent one anywhere. (People in the UK may not find this applies to the tea).

They both become quite unappealing a little while after you make them what they are. --Jumlian

Round 41

AliceInWonderland.  --Vitenka

Because both mean absolutely nothing to people with no experience.  --FlameRider (who can't be bothered to look up what... that thing in the question is) May I suggest following the Links? They're WordOfTheDays I added a few months ago. --CH

Compared to sign language, both let you fit more material in a given space. --Requiem

There are more questionable "Ouch!"-type words than one might expect. --AlexChurchill (I assume)

Pre-positions. --Rachael

Awww.  I was hoping for my HumptyDumpty 'words are my bitches' reference, when combined with 'four impossible stretches before breakfast' would do it :)  --Vitenka  (Posting this messgae purely for the mangled HumptyDumpty quote, and because it is fun to type HumptyDumpty)

Round 40

Delays. --Edwin

Stalls on startup, never lives up to the expectation and ends in crashes.  --Jumlian

Product subject to revision --Edith

Defenestration wished by some, but impossible. --Requiem

Round 39

We declare this man to be the Pope, purple monkey dishwasher! --Requiem

Both involve bad Latin. --Edith

Spineless.  --Vitenka

It's meant to provide reference and inspiration for daily life, but is hindered by the effects of spending too long shut away in old buildings. --AlexChurchill

The correct solution to both involves a plume of smoke --ChrisHowlett

"Politics" sometimes comes before "godliness". --Rachael

The end of each is "Ascension" -- Xarak, in the same vein as Rachel who got in there first :(

If you'd waited jusssssst a little bit longer we'd have gotten the pope selected and then you'd see how right I was.  --Vitenka (reserving the right to delete this comment if the truly unlikely occurs)

Hummm.  I was almost right, since it was a PlaceHolder? compromise candidate.  But I guess I can't really call the head of the Inquisition Spineless :)  --Vitenka

Round 38

Both represent a rising from the grave. --K

You can never have too many of either. --Steve

[Chocolate Zombie Jesus Bunny!]  --Vitenka

You should be scared of what's inside. --AlexChurchill

The supermarkets are full of them. --Rachael (see section 3 of EvilScript for how to misread the entry above mine...)

Well. They must have something in common, or they wouldn't have stayed together so long. --Requiem

Interacting with both results in StickyBrownStuff? --StephenClark

Finding a number of either in your kitchen, would result in you ‘cracking up’ before having to witness ‘your own beast-like consumption’ --Whistway

If you found yourself inside either, you'd have to eat your way out. -- Xarak

Ewwww! --K

You've been April Fooled. They're actually nothing alike. - MoonShadow

Zebra --Edith

Round 37

Their presence, purpose and mode of operation are known to few, and understood by fewer. --ChrisHowlett

"..one man takes on an entire malicious organisation. Training cannot prepare one for everything encountered in the field: in order to accomplish his task, the agent must use his wits and cunning to subvert the organisation using its own rules and procedures.." - scrap of burnt field manual found clutched in the hand of a dead man slumped over a burnt-out computer monitor, in a jelly pit at 2150' below the Microsoft HQ.  - MoonShadow

They both execute unquestioningly --Jumlian

Both can cause great catastrophe if not used correctly. --Steve

They (used to) sit under windows and occasionally jump out, sometimes in batches. Oh, and they don't wear underwear. --Rachael

One should never refuse a commando or a command from your Director of Studies. --qqzm

A good parachute is invaluable.  --Vitenka

They both may Terminate and Stay Resident. --Bobacus

Things often run from both after a see-colon backslash. --Whistway

Um, that sounds more like a proctologist joke ;)  --Vitenka

*Rachael gasps in awe at Whistway*

Round 36

Both can be warded away with the sign of the cross. -- Xarak. As in "Do you have a TV? X"

They can't enter unless you [invite them]. - MoonShadow

Most people take appropriate steps to ward off their attention; woe betide you if you don't... --AlexChurchill

Both have the eerie power to look through walls.  --Vitenka

Both give most definitely unwanted attention.  --FlameRider

Because they are vampires! I thought everyone knew that. --Edith

in a similar vein "Vampires only suck your blood and leave your wallet alone".  Oops.  Wrong question. --Jumlian 

Trenchcoat? Check. Van? Check. Replica Japanese sword? We'll get back to you. --Requiem

The complacent don't believe they really exist. --Rachael

Round 35

Both are more often posessed by the retarded.  --Vitenka (Going for the Evil straight away.)

Because both let you C scales accurately. --AlexChurchill

One is about the truth of audible beauty. The other allows you to see the beauty of truth. --Requiem

Both shatter glass if thrown hard enough. --Edith

Both are made of hydrocarbons. -- Xarak, who thinks "Perfect Pitch" could be a good brand name for the sticky black stuff.

While proper technique can be taught, some people seem to just be born with the ability to use it for scary things.. - MoonShadow

Both are handy, but not nearly as necessary as you might think.  --FlameRider

Because one can be obtained with the other (using a ballistics definition of pitch) --MJ

Round 34

Point to Vitenka (text is an entry, not an indication of judging result - MS)

After some deliberation, point to ChrisHowlett. - MoonShadow

Round 33

Either can only be adequately resolved through Fire?.  --Vitenka wants to BurnStuff?

They're both seen as the solution to some problem, but neither works very well -- Senji

"It is a tale told by an idiot, full of sound and fury, signifying nothing." --MacBeth

Both are likely to suffer from hacks. --SMcV

It's a standing wave on a sea of argument. --Requiem

All talk, no action --K

Apart from the fact that I have no experience with either, I'd guess that in both opinions are discussed endlessly but are rarely actually changed or affected.  --FR

Participants are criticised by non-participants for having too much time on their hands. --Rachael

Round 1: Judge - ChrisHowlett

In retrospect, ChrisHowlett is happy to accept posted entries - but requests that people limit themselves to only one entry. If someone has submitted more than 1, could they choose their favourite and delete the rest, please?

Because a cheese sandwich gets hot, sweaty and smelly when left under the sun in Athens for too long, just like the athletes in the Olympic Games. --AR

PeterTaylor thinks the idea is that we e-mail Chris rather than post our suggestions publically.

That would be very slow, though - does the secrecy actually add anything to the game?  My answer would be "Because I'm not hungry"  --Vitenka

(Rachael agrees with Vitenka.)

Because they're both cheesy and involve large quantities of bread.

Because they're both in grease. (No, this isn't working, is it.)

Because Olympics and sandwich are both eponyms (spot the linguistics graduate.) Surely not? The games are named after a mountain rather than a person, aren't they? IIRC eponyms can be named after places too; cf "sodomy" and "hamburger".

Because one or the other is the only thing on the mind of my workmates at lunchtime. --AlexChurchill (who had thought of doing this via email because it means if two people have similar ideas they could both submit them and whoever got better nuances or phrased it better would win. But this way makes the judge's job fractionally easier (no copypasting of entries) and provides the rest of ToothyWiki with more continual "amusement" rather than seeing it all in a big lump... :) )

Both are improved with the addition of mustard. --Edith

Because while the Greeks made it (cheese/the olympics) first, other did it better, and the wrappings of both (the bread/the media circus) age less well than the central part. --DR

Neither are fish -- Senji (OK, that's crap, but...)

Both of them can be hammed up, but neither is very enjoyable afterwards (ham and cheese sandwiches are icky) - CorkScrew

Because the legal limits for drugs in either are very easy to break (accidentally, honest). --TI

What kind of sandwiches do you eat? (More importantly, where can I buy some? :P ) - CorkScrew

(PeterTaylor sumbmitted by email): Because they're both best enjoyed at the beach.

Congrats Edith! I'd absolutely love to judge a round of this, but am away for most of the BankHolidayWeekend?; thus, until that's over I'll just play as and when I can get access, and submit myself to judge after that. --AlexChurchill